I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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