So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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