4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
