theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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