Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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