Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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