are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
