Cold hands, warm shart.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I think i got beer on your cat.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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