Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
