haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
