Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
