He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
