Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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