I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
