i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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