i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
