There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
