just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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