I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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