He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
