It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Someone signed my nipple.
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