I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
