Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
