I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
