I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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