Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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