At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
