She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize