Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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