Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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