Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
