Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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