Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize