scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
