Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
