Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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