She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
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