just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
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