I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
