Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
