I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize