we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
