so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
