His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize