grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
wow bdsm is so cute
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