so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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