Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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