i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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