There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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