And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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