We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
As shirtless as possible
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize