what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
